July 18th, 2005
So much has happened and so much has been lost. I give my deepest sympathies to those of you have lost someone dear to you. I also hope that those of you who were injured are returned to full health as soon as possible.
Hope seems such a foreign concept just now but we all must keep it within us. This is what will drive us to continue living. We all must have hope.
May 22nd, 2005
Sirius? Are you there?
Please, Sirius... It's almost time.
Current Mood: predatory
April 30th, 2005
|07:37 pm - Private Entry|
I have had a lot of time to think this past week and I decided that I should write it down, lest I forget.
I have mostly been thinking about Sirius' continued disappearances lately. I have yet to confront him about it and I am afraid to admit that I am rather loathe to do so. It is rather like we are back at school ourselves and he and James have gone on a pranking spree without me and Peter. I miss him.
I never understood what Sirius saw in me. He could have had any girl he wanted, as well as a lot of boys and for a while it seemed like he did. But then it stopped. Then he chose me. I just don't know why.
I love him. I don't tell him enough but of course I do. It's just not the type of thing we do and I hardly see him anymore. Perhaps I have lost what he saw in me. Perhaps that is why he keeps disappearing. I have lost him twice already and I do not think I could stand to lose him again.
The worst thing about it all is that he is hurting Harry. Harry has faced so much pain and loss in his life and he does not deserve to be hurt like this. If I do not confront Sirius for my sake, I should for Harry's. I love Harry and I do not want him to be hurt. I want to protect him from what I can because there are things I cannot protect him from and he does not need other things to worry about.
If Sirius leaves me, then I shall be lost. But I shall work through the pain, as I have done before. But I will not allow him to leave Harry.
Current Mood: sad
April 3rd, 2005
|10:09 pm - A Month of Silence|
It has been an extremely long time since I have written anything here. March has been a bit hectic in some aspects and in others it has been the slowest month so far. March always seems to be like this for me.
I feel like I am repeating this a lot and other people, but I must extend my sincere condolences to Slytherin House.
I wrote my great aunt in Niece, who told me all about the recent happening in the family. It seems I have gained a second cousin or three. She said that she understood that it was hard for me to be in touch but I felt extremely guilty and so sent a care package to my cousin Sylvie and her triplets. I do miss France sometimes.
I ordered some more books from Flourish and Blott's and they arrived last week, so I have been trying to fit them into my bookcases but have not been having much luck. I will be looking through my volumes this week, so if anybody would like to see if there are books they can use, feel free to send me an owl or to approach me at meals. I won't bite. Promise.
Lots of my time has also been dedicated to my books but also to various travel guides. Sirius, can we arrange a time to discuss out plans further? When either one of us has been available to discuss these matter, the other hasn't and I'm going to despair if we don't decided in which order and when we will be traveling to these countries. Harry, please also drop by to discuss these matters too. Or anything for that matter!
Current Mood: busy
February 27th, 2005
|07:59 pm - Sincerest Apologies|
First of all, I would like to apologise for any trouble I may have caused in the lesson of your Sex Education presentations. I did not mean for anyone to be distracted and offer my sincerest apologies if I did.
Secondly, Sirius we have run out of bananas in our fruit bowl.
The presentations were most... interesting. I certainly never thought that the amount of effort you put into them was possible. Life size dolls, aiding the people with problems, promoting a healthy diet- I was very impressed.
I have taken to staying in our rooms, to avoid the smell and if I must venture out, I run. It is certainly not the worst smell in existence, but it is extremely pungent.
Nostalgia has also been a common factor of the last few weeks. Sirius, I found the record. It was in amongst the Ray Charles albums. Not in the 'Q' section. I shall let you away with that for now.
Current Mood: hopeful
Current Music: Good old Fashioned Lover Boy- Queen
February 5th, 2005
|12:27 am - February|
It seems that February is the time for change, this year, as well as a time for love. Though Valentines day was really created purely for commercial reasons, to fill in the gap between Christmas and Easter, it brings people together and celebrates love. However, I believe love should be celebrated everyday.
I find Sirius' classes very enjoyable, indeed. Though, perhaps you should cut back on the anecdotes, Sirius?
I do feel... restless, though. I need to go outside more, I think.
Current Mood: restless
January 18th, 2005
|08:11 pm - Hard to believe|
It's hard for me to believe that is over half-way through January, now. It seems hardly anytime ago that it was June and things were so different.
I have spent some organising my record collection- trying to restore the order that was present less than a week ago. It seems I spend a lot more time organising.
But not alone. I spend less time alone, which I am grateful for.
At least the days are getting longer too. The impending spring makes me feel better as well.
I had better go and make sure all the records are still in order.
Current Mood: contemplative
January 1st, 2005
|01:20 am - New Year|
I wish everyone a happy New Year and many more to come! Bonne santé!
The past year has been... full of suprises. Some good and some bad. Some were placed somewhere in the shades of grey. A year full of joy, sorrow, anger, love and many more emotions has just passed. A year full of discoveries and mystery lies ahead, I'm sure.
For me, it's nice to be at Hogwarts during the holidays. I hope everyone else has a splendid evening!
Current Mood: ever so slightly tipsy
December 16th, 2004
|04:43 pm - Christmas|
Since Sirius and Harry decided to leave Christmas up to me:
We shall be having Christmas at the cottage.
On Christmas Eve the door to my room shall be locked and no-one can enter.
In the morning we will open presents and have breakfast.
The beach and rest of the cottage are open all day.
We will be having a proper Christmas dinner if it's the last thing I ever do.
Anything anyone would like to add?
Current Mood: slightly annoyed
December 5th, 2004
|07:55 pm - The Beach and Cottage|
The beach and cottage are just as I remember them, except colder. It's so quiet compared to Hogwarts and I find myself missing the buzz of general chatter, though it is a relief to have some quiet.
Harry, I'm sure I can help you with your project for Mrs. Weasley. I have mended enought to clothes to become a tailor and made enough scarves and jumpers to fill Madame Malkin's back rooms.
Oh, and Tonks, sorry I missed your birthday. I will make it up to you!
Current Mood: relaxed